Relationships are about balance.  Let me explain.  Have you ever been in the grocery store, or on the bus, and you say hello to the person next to you?  Yes, we all have.  Now, have you ever had that person respond with a dissertation of everything about them?  All the way down to what they had for breakfast?  This is a perfect example of an imbalance in a relationship.  When you are making friends with someone you HAVE to have an even give and take of information sharing for the relationship to develop in a normal and healthy way.  Those first interactions can be overcome, but they usually are a mirror for the way the rest of the relationship will go.  That whole “first impressions” thing rings true.

So next time you are in the grocery store, and you have the urge to talk about your c-section to the woman next to you, try saying a simple “hi” and talk about the weather. J  I don’t mean to be simplistic, or to insult your intelligence.  But that initial interaction lays the ground work for a relationship of trust.  From there the other topics can be added upon.  Some of my best friendships have taken years to foster because that ground work takes time.  And now we can talk about everything under the sun and know that it is fair game, and that we’re in emotionally safe hands.

On a side note; if you find yourself really having that urge to share enormous amounts of information with a stranger- it may be a sign that you should seek a therapist.  I don’t mean to joke.  When I was newly married, I had a devastating experience.  I found out that the baby I was carrying had passed away and the doctors wanted to wait and see how my body would pass it naturally.  It was a horrible time.  I was only 10 weeks pregnant, but already had to wear maternity clothes.  Women would ask me how things were going, and one day I found myself dumping everything on a poor cashier in a store I frequented.  I will never forget the shock and horror on her face.  She did not bargain for what I gave her with her simple “how are you today”, but boy did I unload.  It was at that moment I realized I needed help with this burden, and couldn’t carry it myself.  And there are just some things in life that shouldn’t be done alone.  That is where our great friends, and paid professionals, come in.

Good relationships make life sweeter, the mornings brighter, and life more worth living.  And I pray I am able to help make your relationships a happier thing through what I have learned in my studies and my own experiences.  Until next time, have a great day.  And remember to build your relationships with balance.